Montreal Works Miracles?

"Tangled" By Maroon 5

I'm full of regret
For all things that I've done and said
And I don't know if it'll ever be ok to show
My face 'round here
Sometimes I wonder if I disappear

Would you ever turn your head and look
See if I'm gone
Cause I fear

There is nothing left to say to you
That you wanna hear
That you wanna know
I think I should go
The things I've done are way too shameful

Your just innocent
A helpless victim of a spider's web
And I'm an insect
Goin after anything that I can get

So you better turn your head and run
And don't look back
Cause I fear

There is nothing left to say
To you
That you wanna hear
That you wanna know
I think I should go
The things I've done are way too shameful

And I've done you so wrong
Treated you bad
Strung you along
Oh shame on myself
I don't know how I got so tangled up



I would not really say this song is my current mood, but parts will suffice. Continued to face the inner "demons", with little success. But it was good after a long week and a long day to just come home and sit back in the recliner and rest. Lit a few candles actually, not for the atmosphere, but because my dad made something weird for dinner. But the candle light gave a pretty cool effect to watching Maroon 5 live in concert at Montreal, of course the H-Def helps as well, lol. Very poor grammar in this post, it will not continue.

Take my breath away
make everyday
worth all of the pain that i have gone through

Can I Get An Update? 3rd post

Class this morning up at Macon State in Macon. Sam followed me up and Lauren met us there. We had a quiz first thing at 8. I think we each missed one, not the same one however. Lecture was intense, and I say that in all honesty. I felt like I received all my high school chemistry in a matter of 80 minuets. Jetted down to Perry for work at the conclusion of class. Once again I became lost and confused while in Perry. Some places I swear... I found my way however and clocked in with a minuet to spare. While today was not as eventful as yesterday (ig the tornadoes), the time still manager to pass with relative ease. Misty and Ruth Ann let me do some PCT work, which was interesting, I got over my fears and that ewww gross voice inside my head. Great people down there, as well as at the Warner Robins hospital. Payday is tomorrow, finally! Swung by the church on my way home from work. Was greeted instantly as i pulled in by Katie, "Hey look it's Josh!" Made me feel pretty good and realize how much I missed being there. Heard about Kenny's wedgie and shot the breeze with Bill and BP. Gave Matty the biggest hug I've ever given a fellow male. Missed Trevor because he was at work, extremely sad face. Good day overall; however, I still can not break free from the desires to, regress for lack of better words. maybe flashback would work. Yeah that's a Lit term. I hope my Lit teacher reads this like she should, it might score me some extra points. lol. Mellisa would ride my case if she knew, too bad she doesn't read this and I don't work with her until next week. But I do thank her, that had to been one of the best nights of work. Even though she was like 28, well that's how old i say she is, she's actually a bit older, she knew what to say. But I soon found it is easy to get into a mindset when someone is there holding you up, but I soon as i left flashbacks worse than the rain that was falling.

How long, how long will I slide
I don't believe it's fair
I don't ever wanna feel like I did that day
Take me to the place I love
Take me o away

Poetry is at it's best when mixed with music I have found. I really wanted to play some music tonight at the church, maybe next time. I do believe that is what I will be doing tonight, just making music, oh how I do miss it, along with other things...

I no longer wish to be haunted by this thing I have called memory,
too often has it destroyed good moods instead of prolonging their existence,
while I aid ailing patients all day I ponder to myself "where is my nurse?",
No, they are not at the bottom of a bottle or the end of a pipe,
with haste I furiously over turn rocks in vein,
as they slip to the ground my hopes fall intertwined them,
only to be traversed over and covered by earth,
buried without hesitation or regard for their potential,
when my demise approaches its climax a reunion shall occur,
between lost hopes, body, and cold earth from which we all originate,
anything would be relinquished in order to obtain warmth again,
a sensation no star in the universe could provide
a sensation only achieved from being by your side

There Mrs Aiken, poetry
A+ yeah?

2 in one day

Not 2 posts in one day (even though that would be an excellent guess), but 2 tornadoes in one day. Better yet, in one afternoon. Today was my first day working down in the Perry ICU. While the first few hours never seemed to pass, after lunch God opened up the floodgates and made it rain. Two tornadoes touched down miles from the hospital. During the second one Anna and I stood outside and actually were able to see the clouds circulating and forming a funnel. Holly and Her got some pretty amazing pictures. I did not have my cell so I took zero. sad face. Aside from the weather, I performed my job extremely well, which makes me happy after only three days of training. There is always something new to learn and the folks are great down there, all way older than me, but great none the less. Overall an exciting and very good day.

The First One

I have heard life best described as a river that is always running and ever changing. I do agree with this metaphor; however, it does not make me happy to do so. Sometimes I wish life would stay the same, that the current would just tire and stop. Maybe it is because I loath not being in control, or maybe I detest the unknown future. I was happy where this river called life had taken me. A happiness had overtaken me, one that was completely new and seemed to have no ending in sight. The view from the river was spectacular. For the first time I was overfilled with joy and could not ask or wish for anything more. Things sure have changed. I feel as if I ave fallen off of the boat and in a panic and frenzy I am trying to stay afloat. As I frantically make my way to the surface I see my boat swiftly making its way downstream. The boat was the prize of my fleet. the only one who never let me down. A boat that I would be more than happy to be bound to for life. It had the perfect name, Caitlin. I begin to swim harder and faster than I ever imagined possible, but with no avail. So here I am, caught in the never ending flow of the river. Making my way ever so slowly down stream the river called life. While I have no boat to aid in this journey, all of the swimming one my own has begun to make me stronger. I still long for my vessel of old, and can only pray it has not attacked by pirates. When and if I find it again, I will love it even more. So for now I swim and stay afloat, but my eyes are fixed on the horizon and my hopes hinge on seeing that familiar boat waiting for me at a port.